"I?ve been moody lately
It?s been going on for a while now. Since December I think. One minute I?m happy and living this great life, the next minute I don?t want anyone talking to me. I?m angry for no reason.
I used to have mood swings back in the day, from my early teens to maybe my mid twenties. I was the queen of snobs; l was so good at making people feel like they don?t exist...I mean I went through five years of University with less than three friends...others I ignored. But as I grew older, I started gradually leaving those moody days behind me. I thought I was completely over it...its kinda back.
Nothing in particular triggers it, I just find myself not in the best of moods. Nowadays I get easily angry; I?ve become aggressive, impatient, rude sometimes. It's like something is messing with my head. I don?t like it.
I don?t know what the problem is. I don?t know if it?s lack of sex, lack of a boyfriend...I know it?s not money, ?cos I?m making more money now than ever before. Not only am I making money from my business, which has been really great lately, I?ve also started making hundreds of thousands of naira from this blog on a monthly basis...that should make me happy right? Well, what the hell is wrong with me half the time then?
These days I?m hardly ever in the mood to socialize. I get all these invites to events, but I haven?t been to any... I didn?t even go for the Future Awards.
Yesterday I walked out on a client who wanted me to direct a billboard shoot for him. He was making all these demands and didn?t want to pay much and I just lost it. I got up and walked out of his office. I?ve never done anything like that before. I didn?t even call to apologize.
Today, I was supposed to have meetings with a client my company is organizing the Unilag trade fair for and another client I?m helping to organize a show for next Friday...but guess what? I haven?t stepped out of my house all day. I didn?t even go to the office.
I don?t know what is wrong with me. Maybe I?m stressed? I?m doing so many things at the same time. I?m trying to revive my magazine and I?m co-producing this new show, I?m running my business, I?m running this blog all by myself, I?m responsible for all these people ...I?m taking care of all these people...no one?s taking care of me. It's lonely sometimes. Maybe all this is beginning to get to me? I don?t know, I?m just, I mean there?s so much I?m thankful for. So much! But sometimes I just...
Anyway, just felt like sharing that. Thanks for reading.
God bless
Linda"
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